And it's been life changing.
And really, really difficult.
Here's what I've learned: change is hard. Insanely, endlessly, almost ridiculously hard. The practices that up until this point I've loyally adhered to - cozying up with a cup o' joe in the morning, settling down with a Blue Moon at the end of the day, going weeks without as much as a walk around the block, over scheduling what seems to be every single moment, and eating mindlessly at most meals - are the same practices that have been causing overwhelming distress within my body. And as much as I know these vices aren't serving me when enjoyed on a daily basis, I've been - you guessed it! - enjoying them on a daily basis. Why would a perfectly rational vegan lady choose to engage in activities that are seemingly fine, but deep down destructive? Because they provide a sense of comfiness in my life. What they don't provide, however, is much more detrimental, because by sticking with them, I've kept myself from being a completely healthy, present, whole Lindsay.
All of this cleansing has got me thinking about going vegan three years ago. For me, I didn't ever - and will never - waiver at the act of abstaining from animal products in my life. To be honest, the change of going vegan in all areas of my life wasn't difficult or annoying or painful - it was something I happily took on, because I was doing it for a cause larger than me. Fast forward to now - I'm making changes that I should be feeling over the moon about, and instead, I find myself feeling like a five-year old girl whose just lost her favorite doll. Don't get me wrong - most of the new habits I've formed are keepers. I've loved the affirmations, neti pot, and abundant amounts of produce in my diet now. But the rest? It's been a rocky road.
But, here's the thing - it's been almost 21 days, and I haven't fallen off the Crazy Sexy wagon yet. I've been in countless situations these past few weeks where caffeine and alcohol and limited thinking have abounded, and yet, I've lovingly reminded myself of how important it is to me to finish this adventure. While it hasn't been perfect (no one said it would or should), I've remained strong. And it has taught me this simple treasure:
I can do anything.
Seriously. I can.
And since this epiphany, I've realized - anybody can live vegan. It just takes the realization that you can do it, even when it's hard, even when you want to go back to your old ways, even when people pressure you to conform. You can live vegan.
Also, if Kris Carr has taught me anything (and BOY, has she), it's that there is a whole life to be lived if I would just stop pushing. Making the time for self-care has been hands down the HARDEST part of this whole shebang. Because I'd much rather make lists, run errands, and "be productive" than sit my tush down on a meditation blanket and say "OM" for twenty minutes. But with Kris's help, I am slowly learning that when space is created in one's life, it opens up the door to so many gifts of abundance. As a natural born pusher, this is nearly impossible to master at first. And after 20 days, it's still tough. But I'm getting there.
And since this epiphany, I've realized - anybody can live vegan. It just takes the realization that you can do it, even when it's hard, even when you want to go back to your old ways, even when people pressure you to conform. You can live vegan.
So how does this apply to living vegan? Well, the minute you stop pushing to make this lifestyle feel like work is the minute it becomes blissfully easy. What if we woke up each morning, excited to make living vegan a priority in our lives rather than bogged down by the "limitations" or "inconvenience" it causes us? What if we broke it down to the simple truth that living vegan is a joy to behold, not a burden or life sentence. All of a sudden, those "limitations" become boundary-less, and that "inconvenience" seems almost silly in comparison to the precious gift that a vegan lifestyle is for us.
And what if I woke up excited to give myself over to a present and calm existence instead of push, push, pushing? I might just find that I am enough. And that this life is such a precious gift. And that when I make room for new, I make room for love. Because of Kris Carr, I will never look at change the same way
again.
I will end with the affirmation from the first day of the cleanse. Please, my lovely, kiss-worthy readers - buy yourself this book. Dive deep into this cleanse. Have fun with it, challenge yourself, and see how far you can go. You just may surprise yourself in the most delicious way. At the very least, you will learn to open your life up to a whole new you. And what could be better than that?
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